Out of mind!

Immature, ignorant, small minded….

There is a day when I want to be a complete weirdooo, an immature, ignorant and small minded baby adult.  Carefreely after everything I wanted… but Lord knows, there is no such a thing. It just doesn’t turn the way I want it, I might realized later that its  simply turned out to be even better.

Though, in between I feel exhausted for no reason and hardly wanting extra medicine to replace the pain comes from living too hard and loving too hard. Bratz, I hate one sided things. Doesn’t it have to be equally the same? For fair sake? Don’t you wish to own a love that gives as much as you do, that is always striving and yearning?

Here you go, my single minded blurt out again. Im nobody to complain. Im enjoying. Been a while, im living my own path, on my own. Guess I nearly forget how does it feel to be loved realistically in reality? By friends, family, men and women. Most of my Friday night im engaged on my own imagination. Even when I feel my day falls apart, I chose my comfort food for support. To give me temporary sweet and tender time. Deep down, Lord knows on my pray…I want a real loving soul who will always there to cheer me. Nicely giving a massage after a Taft day. Eat and sit back to relax at the end of the day just watching movies. Just us. to have those kind os argument. And of course, tell me that im look pretty in a corny way.. ah, did I demanding that much?

To me, one day, reread these hopes and desires, smiling at the things that came to fruition, and wondering what happened to those that didn’t..