Finding Halal Rezq

The past years I have  a sudden change of direction and a growing concerns in reconciling my faith over my career. Alhamdulillah for the past 8 years, Allah has bestowed his blessing upon me to taste this hospitality industry without having to take out my hijab. I am not a flawless hijabi either. But having learned another moslem ummah experience out there, hamdallah inspired me a lot for me to learn as a better muslima. Its not always an easy road to travel to. 

What it has to do with hijab? You probably asked. It's not an easy industry to work for, especially for a hijabi like me. I am not a perfect hijabi in the hood. But I am thankful to be able to passed on the phase. Where I became the only hijabi worker in the entire company. All these years I have been working at. 

SubanAllah.. It ain't easy.. to keep my identity and making a living in this filed. 

Islam on the other way, always encouraging their Ummah to find a halal rezki (earnings). This has brought a long battle to me deep inside. 

And as I learned more about finding the halal rezki, I do become uneasy in continuing this career. Working in hotel industry (as many of us might aware of) alcohols and pork are a basic trading consumption for hotels guests. On top of that, there are too many maksiat (mixing with non mahram) happening inside. 

I am not trying to be judgmental, but honestly these had hardened my heart. Believe it or not, when you have non-halal rezki, you won't feel contended with that you own. Often I experienced, losing rezki (either stolen or any other way).. then I thought perhaps this is the sign. 

Even if I do sadaqah or zakat, still the turmoil began urging within.. 

As always, I turned to Allah the most merciful, I am making reasonable distance in noble manner with my current colleagues. With all due respects but I feel so much better focus on doing what I do than meddling with other business like they mostly do. I might not pleased people's eyes, but all I care about is if Allah swt be pleased with me. 

Allah swt is the supreme loving creator. Over prayers and supplications, I think I am ready to replace my existing career path towards a better options. For Jannah, inshaAllah.. 

I just need a little more time. To carefully plan. If Allah swt grant me long live within this year, inshaAllah I'll be able to find tune in doing something that could benefit the ummah here and after instead. 

No I will not turn into an Ustadzah, my knowledge is too shallow for that path. I am however, striving to learn more of Islamic teaching, the most logical faith I ever learned, if I may say. 

Guess I know what I wanted to do. I am keen to explore the creative side of me, I used to do many creative stuffs. Just need to dig in again the neglected skills. InshaAllah Sadaqah charity events will go along the way, I'd like to establish a long-term beneficial act for the society especially within the ummah. 

I just have to endure a little while. Bismillah..